High's and Low's

What an adventure! 216 meters..the highest in the world.. Every moment was fun..

And then the next morning I woke up with a song in my head...a song that's been in my life for some time, but I never REALLY listened...and then, it's like a puzzle clicking into place..clarity regarding the relationship with my "partner in adventure"

So the low settles in and has been overwhelming my emotions for the past three days. .flashing memories only emphasizing the hurt.

But first listen to the song in my head:



Delerium - After All Lyrics

She knows the voices in her mind
They tell her
To leave

She's tired of smiling madly
Until silence becomes very silently
A noise in her mind

After all she has nothing inside
No good to give
No meaning to live
The mist engulfed tonight
Every single star

After all they shared
How could he simply say no
After all they shared
He turned away from her to go
She said she wouldn't cry
That was really just a lie

She knows the noises in her mind
Nothing's left but
Screaming silence

After all she feels numbness inside
The feeling's gone
She's upside down
The pictures behind her closed eyes
This time you went too far

After all they shared
How could he simply say no
After all they shared
He turned away from her to go
She said she wouldn't cry
That was really just a lie

After all they shared
How could he simply say no
After all they shared
He turned away from her to go
She said she wouldn't cry
That was really just a lie

After all she has nothing inside
No good to give
No meaning to live
The mist engulfed tonight
Every single star

After all they shared
How could he simply say no
After all they shared
He turned away from her to go
She said she wouldn't cry
That was really just a lie

After all they shared
How could he simply say no (simply say no)
After all they shared
He turned away from her to go
She said she wouldn't cry
That was really just a lie

After all they shared
How could he simply say no (simply say no)
After all they shared
He turned away from her to go
She said she wouldn't cry
That was really just a lie

After all they shared
How could he simply say no (how could he simply say no)
After all they shared (after all)
He turned away from her to go (he just turned away)
She said she wouldn't cry
That was really just a lie

Realising that I have been in this position before, I paged through my journal and came across the following..Ironic that 3 years later I have not learnt my lesson.

A moment of clarity.

'n Oomblik van helderheid..

Jy was 'n tydsverdryf, 'n
verbeeldingsvlug, 'n fantasie op voete.
Om energie aan jou te spandeer sal wees soos
om 'n droe put met 'n drupper te probeer opvul.

Maybe the biggest part of the hurt is the dissappointment with myself that I keep on making the same mistakes..what will it take to finally let the lesson sink in??